narcissism: double-binds

A colleague tells another colleague that the older colleague is better off retired. The rest of the older faculty should retire as well.
The colleague to whom this is addressed (let's call her N) is very upset and tells the other senior faculty about the incident.
The younger colleague first denies she said it and then admits she did.
N having raised the issue as one of "ageism" then switches grounds and says we should not be angry with the younger colleague as she did not know that ageism is illegal (and insulting).
Those enrolled to resist ageism are then suddenly the bad people. Only the narcissist is at the center at each turn of the bind.

Substitute racial or gender epithets for age and see what happens.